How are your practices of Ministry going to change?

A little over a month ago, I spent a week in deep reflection on my life and ministry.  I will write three blogs to speak to some of the things I've learned, in hopes that my friends will understand better who I am and where God is taking me.

How are your practices of Ministry going to change?

As I returned home it was very clear to me that huge changes needed to occur in my life.  I was ignoring some massive problems at my church that included: emotion based preaching, a void of rest, authority of the Spirit elevated over the Word, and an absence of accountability.  As I saw it, those problems came as a direct result of the way that our Senior Pastor was leading.  In addition to those problems that were affecting our whole church, he had personal problems that included a lack of Covenant collegiality, no desire for relationship with his staff, inability to forgive, absence of trust, lack of care for brothers and sisters in disagreement, and inability to share the pulpit.  I recognized that by ignoring those things in the name of unity, I was sharing in the responsibility for them.  As I returned home I was convinced that I must do what I could to change the culture of our church by working with my Senior Pastor.

I also recognized more fully that things could not move forward without reconciliation between my wife and my pastor’s wife.   

Coming back to my church I was convinced that I had the tools to begin the hard work of learning to collaborate with my Senior Pastor, but I realized that there had to be a desire on his part for that kind of teamwork.  So instead of ignoring him, or competing with him I just tried to ask him questions.  I asked questions like “what’s your desire/vision for the church?  What are you looking for in your life?   How do you see the state of the union between you and me?  Do you see a future for us working together?”  The answers to those questions and the discussions that followed were telling and heartbreaking.  There was truly no desire to work together.  He saw himself as the leader of the church and me as “staff” that was not to be a part in making decisions about the church.  He saw my views of ministry as wrong and unworthy of his consideration or conversation.

In addition, my wife sat down with his wife and asked similar questions.  My wife was told that she was “not worth her (the Sr. Pastor’s wife’s) time and energy,” and that my wife was untrustworthy and there was not a desire to allow her to earn trust.

So the first answer to the question of how my ministry will change is that I have resigned my position as Youth Pastor at Selah Covenant Church and I am looking for a new call in ministry.

As I move forward in ministry there will be many changes as a result of this class.  First, I plan on taking Seminary classes to work toward a Pastoral degree and to be better prepared for future ministry.  

I also will be firm in only serving in ministries that value accountability.  I will make sure that any ministry that I am a part of has a Pastoral Relations Committee (or something similar) to hold me and the other leadership of the church to the standard of God’s Word and to deal with conflict in a healthy manner.

Instead of working in my default conflict modes of trying to get my way, I will establish a collaborative environment with all teams that I serve with.  This will be of first importance with those I am under the authority of and those I am responsible for.  In order to do this I will have to be accountable to them to make sure I am in check since collaboration can be difficult for me.

It became evident as I took this course that I was missing self-reflection in my life and in ministry.  Christ tells us that the greatest calling is to Love God and to love others as we love ourselves.  I think I have neglected the pursuit of myself and I’ve neglected the tools available for helping my students pursue personal reflection.  I plan on doing more of that in my future and specifically using the Enneagram to help others and myself to understand better who we are and how we relate to God.

           I plan on making personal time with God a greater emphasis in my future ministry and using the Grow resources to encourage others to spend time with God.